Dane Mallahan

Hey there folks,

I didn’t even realize until today that I had not written a post last week.  Though, now that I look back on that week, I know why.  I have had a few interviews lined up for jobs, one in particular that I thought I was really well suited for.  That job would have been perfect for me, monetarily and time commitment wise, and I would have been very interested and engaged.  Unfortunately I was not hired.  It hurt.  It hurt a lot.  Since the pandemic “ended” I have felt like my life is a rollercoaster of events.  Every time I would get my hopes up for something, it would either not pan out, or something else would occur that would eliminate any gains I had made emotionally, spiritually, or financially.  So I have become sort of an emotionless husk, until I absolutely positively know that what I am looking forward to will actually come to fruition.  I got ahead of myself this time and it stings worse than alcohol on an open wound.  

I grew up poor, but I was taught that hard work and dedication pays off, and I have always been that type of person; I would work harder than everyone else, do whatever it took to get things done.  Because of this, and maybe because of the time or the place, I have always found it easy to pick up a job, even if it is in another line of work or industry.  That isn’t the case anymore.  If you don’t have three years of experience in something that is only two years old, no one even bats an eye at your application.  I guess the job market is hard right now, and was part of the reason why I delved so deep and so hard into writing, but that has its own twists and turns and highs and lows.  

Since that week, I have sort of been taking it easy and reflecting, getting back to some video game time as that has sorely been missed in my life.  Once I found out I was not selected for that job I started working on my office again, trying to work out recording software so I can make videos, and record some of my stories in audio form.  I decided to try and go full steam ahead.  But I have another potential job, and that has slowed me down, but that would be a good thing.  There may be a lot of driving in the position – I know it’s BS to not know ahead of time – so one thing in particular I have been trying this week is the voice typing aspect of Google Docs.  I have “written” seven or so pages between driving around this week and my daily walks.  

This week I also got back into working on the outline for Path of The Chosen book three.  I have about 30-35 chapters outlined or bullet pointed for that book.  I have been thinking about sharing more about the first book and what I have been thinking about changing or doing with it moving forward, but part of me wants to get back to just writing.  That part of me wants to finish the series so I can have my material ready and then focus on audience engagement.  I know that I need to try and engage in social media more, try and do things to get people interested in my writing, but I have no idea what to do or where to start.  I guess that’s what doing some videos would be.  I just have to do it.  

That has reminded me of a principal I thought of when I was younger called “fuck it”.  It’s this idea that someone can be held back from doing something for so long, for whatever reason, and the only way that person – or some people like me – will ever start something is to just say, fuck it, and do it.  Just let go and try.  The instance for me was feeling trepidation about welding some floor panels into a car that I was working on.  I had no idea what I was doing and scared shitless that I was going to light myself on fire – which did almost happen – but I took the precautions that I needed and eventually just said fuck it and started doing it.  It was terrible, the welds sucked, but I got better at it, sort of.  Ahh, back in my ‘younger’ years.  I don’t know if I am at that point yet with the videos and the other social media stuff, but I think it’s close.

Hopefully I will get some clarity in the next few weeks.  Until then I will keep writing.  I think I will start posting on reddit soon, even if it’s just a link to these blogs.  Maybe that is the issue I have; is it even worth posting everywhere if I have only a few things to share?  I guess I don’t know, so I should let the audience decide.

Anyway, I think that’s it for this week’s update – on writing and on life – I hope y’all have a good Friday and safe weekend.

Cheers,

Dane